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*** Telling people about it still isn’t easy or fun, but it’s my own magic Hogwarts-esque sorting hat.

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It might be better to break the news about herpes to someone who has already grown attached to you.

Kissing, cuddling, and fondling are safe, so you don't have to tell before you do that.

Second, don't wait until you're just about to have sex -- in which case the attraction may be too strong for either of you to think rationally and act responsibly.